14/11/10

LOVE IS NOT A RELATIONSHIP. Love relates, but it is not a relationship. A relationship is something finished. A relationship is a noun; the full stop has come, the honeymoon is over. Now there is no joy, no enthusiasm, now all is finished. You can carry it on, just to keep your promises. You can carry it on because it is comfortable, convenient, cozy. You can carry it on because there is nothing else to do. You can carry it on because if you disrupt it, it is going to create much trouble for you… Relationship means something complete, finished, closed.

Love is never a relationship; love is relating. It is always a river, flowing, unending. Love knows no full stop; the honeymoon begins but never ends. It is not like a novel that starts at a certain point and ends at a certain point. It is an ongoing phenomenon. Lovers end, love continues– it is a continuum. It is a verb, not a noun.

And why do we reduce the beauty of relating to relationship? Why are we in such a hurry? Because to relate is insecure, and relationship is a security. Relationship has a certainty; relating is just a meeting of two strangers, maybe just an overnight stay and in the morning we say goodbye. Who knows what is going to happen tomorrow? And we are so afraid that we want to make it certain, we want to make it predictable. We would like tomorrow to be according to our ideas; we don't allow it freedom to have its own say. So we immediately reduce every verb to a noun.

You are in love with a woman or a man and immediately you start thinking of getting married. Make it a legal contract. Why? How does the law come into love? The law comes into love because love is not there. It is only a fantasy, and you know the fantasy will disappear. Before it disappears settle down, before it disappears do something so it becomes impossible to separate.

In a better world, with more meditative people, with a little more enlightenment spread over the earth, people will love, love immensely, but their love will remain a relating not a relationship. And I am not saying that their love will be only momentary. There is every possibility their love may go deeper than your love, may have a higher quality of intimacy, may have something more of poetry and more of godliness in it. And there is every possibility their love may last longer than your so-called relationship ever lasts. But it will not be guaranteed by the law, by the court, by the policeman. The guarantee will be inner. It will be a commitment from the heart, it will be a silent communion.

If you enjoy being with somebody, you would like to enjoy it more and more. If you enjoy the intimacy, you would like to explore the intimacy more and more. And there are a few flowers of love which bloom only after long intimacies. There are seasonal flowers too; within six weeks they are there, in the sun, but within six weeks again they are gone forever. There are flowers that take years to come, and there are flowers that take many years to come. The longer it takes, the deeper it goes. But it has to be a commitment from one heart to another heart. It has not even to be verbalized, because to verbalize it is to profane it. It has to be a silent commitment; eye to eye, heart to heart, being to being. It has to be understood, not said.

Forget relationships and learn how to relate.

Once you are in a relationship you start taking each other for granted– that's what destroys all love affairs. The woman thinks she knows the man, the man thinks he knows the woman. Nobody knows either! It is impossible to know the other, the other remains a mystery. And to take the other for granted is insulting, disrespectful.

To think that you know your wife is very, very ungrateful. How can you know the woman? How can you know the man? They are processes, they are not things. The woman that you knew yesterday is not there today. So much water has gone down the Ganges; she is somebody else, totally different. Relate again, start again, don't take it for granted.

And the man that you slept with last night, look at his face again in the morning. He is no more the same person, so much has changed. So much, incalculably much has changed. That is the difference between a thing and a person. The furniture in the room is the same, but the man and the woman, they are no more the same. Explore again, start again. That's what I mean by relating.

Relating means you are always starting, you are continuously trying to become acquainted. Again and again, you are introducing yourself to each other. You are trying to see the many facets of the other's personality. You are trying to penetrate deeper and deeper into his realm of inner feelings, into the deep recesses of his being. You are trying to unravel a mystery which cannot be unraveled. That is the joy of love: the exploration of consciousness.

And if you relate, and don't reduce it to a relationship, then the other will become a mirror to you. Exploring him, unawares you will be exploring yourself too. Getting deeper into the other, knowing his feelings, his thoughts, his deeper stirrings, you will be knowing your own deeper stirrings too. Lovers become mirrors to each other, and then love becomes a meditation. Relationship is ugly, relating is beautiful.

Hence I say relate. By saying relate, I mean remain continuously on a honeymoon. Go on searching and seeking each other, finding new ways of loving each other, finding new ways of being with each other. And each person is such an infinite mystery, inexhaustible, unfathomable, that it is not possible that you can ever say, "I have known her," or, "I have known him." At the most you can say, "I have tried my best, but the mystery remains a mystery."

14/11/10

Your transactions are being processed(its immaterial for us who are processing)

plants are classified in four major head(we not know who classified the plants)

lunch are being made(its immaterial for us who are preparing the lunch)

sabagi aa rahe he (jab ghar me bhoge hota he)

jase lunch ban raha he lunch banane wala kahata he ke sabji kate de aap bole te he sabge kate rahe he

its immsterial who are cutting sabge

sade ya koi ghar me function ho to passive voice jayada use hota he

jase chode to ........chaode aa

sabje la to...........laa raha he(being came)

fruit function re washte la to.........lawan gayo(have been gone)

17 baate Q pooche raha he tume khane se matalab he

naale sapha ho gaye ge (have been cleaned)

have you been availabled the vegetable (hame ye matalab nahi he kise dukandar ne bhage he)

wheel was discovered in old stone age(who discovered wheel is immaterial)

actually passive voice used

1.puppet drama

2.august rust

3.ATM machine

4.worlds runs by GOD indirectly

5.subject ko background se bahar nikal ne liye for example

minute handle is being run ed by pencil cell.

Minute handle is runing.

Now you are connected to DSL.(kisne connected kiya its immeterial)

14/10/10

how to impart learning so that teacher make maximize impact on mind of students ? this question perplexing me after I joined this profession. i think answer is that we have to learn student not only subject wise method but also by linguistic wise method. second is the new method which i seek to apply. as everyone know no one represent oneself without using language to communicate. and if you are learning something 

12/10/10(2)

it is not ability or any capability which decided your success or your career but it is the time which would decide that your ability are of any kind of use in this given circumstance ......... 

12/10/10(2)

i think will power is like a thrust which is required to implement your goal and day to day schedule without will power your life couldn't  remain on the trek and such person deviate from his true goal........ 

12/10/10

its immaterial  How much you are intelligent? its immaterial What kind of special ability you have? but its imperative for you How specially and How elegantly you represent yourself? May be your poor representation play a obstructive role in your life so before it go bed to worst, reform it. Bhaget Shing was just 21 years of age when he was hanged to death. Its all about maturity and representation which matter most your life no anything else. God Bless You.

10/10/10

to be successful in life I have to conquer two obstructive negative characters first timidity and  second laziness. in case of me these are playing very hindering role. what I do to root out these monster ? for that i have to built will-power.